Posts tagged on our radar

Bollywood actress Aishwarya Rai has been criticized for her looks during her pregnancy, and her post-baby body is now the subject of an article entitled: “How the ‘most beautiful woman in the world’ has been accused of betraying her country for failing to lose her baby weight.”

From the DailyMail:

‘There is a glorification of motherhood in India and Indian cinema,’ he told the paper. ‘But people are confused because they don’t know whether to glorify Aishwarya in her new motherhood or lament that she is not looking like a runway model.’

What are your thoughts on post-baby weight/celebrity?  Read the full article here.

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The following column about eating disorders in the Asian American community, written by Dr. Esther Oh, is published in the May 2012 issue of KoreAm!

Three points for breaking the silence!

When was the last time you saw a plus-size Asian woman in a movie?

A magazine? A TV show? Chances are you probably haven’t. What we’re used to seeing are the petite ones, a sign that our culture has an obsession with being thin. While the Western world has Weight Watchers, some Asian women turn to extreme diet fads— strong Chinese herbal drinks, ultrasonic liposuction and even swallowing parasites.  It’s important to keep our weight in check, but has our fixation on thinness gotten out of control?

What’s considered “average” in America can often be seen as “large” in Asia. I’ve heard from multiple women who wear a small here in the States, but have to go up a size or even two when they’re shopping in Asian countries.  Here, they’re considered fit; there, they’re called fat.

With this type of mindset, it’s no surprise that eating disorders are on the rise. Nearly 24 million Americans suffer from one, but it’s unclear how many Asian Americans are affected because many don’t seek treatment. Often they don’t believe they have a problem or the stigma against mental health problems prevents them from seeking help.  First off, an eating disorder is not just when someone starves him/herself.  People who eat too much to the point of causing physical or mental harm can also have one. It’s most common among women, but there’s been an increase in the number of men being diagnosed.  For men, the focus is on muscularity and definition in their bodies rather than weight loss.

Check out the rest of the article here. 

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Jason Sperber shared this Colorlines article with us on our Facebook Page, and we’re glad that he did because it was a powerful article on Kuttin Kandi, a Hip-Hop activist and DJ. An influential figure in the Hip-Hop space, DJ Kuttin Kandi was “the first woman to reach the DMC USA Finals and a founding member of the all-female Anomolies crew, the Queens-bred Filipina turntablist has shared the stage with legends (Kool Herc, Afrika Bambaataa), big kids (MC Lyte, LL Cool J) and period contemporaries (Jay-Z, dead prez, Immortal Technique). In addition to beat juggling and competition-judging, she writes revealing poems, lectures regularly, does grassroots organizing and serves as a mentor and educator at the UC San Diego Women’s Center. She’s also spearheading a compilation album, The Womyn’s Hip-Hop Movement, co-writing a book about Filipino-Americans in hip-hop culture, and she proudly represents the 5th Platoon crew, Guerrilla Words and R.E.A.C.Hip-Hop (Representing Education, Activism & Community Through Hip Hop).”

At the moment, though, DJ Kuttin Kandi, also known by friends and family as Candice Custodio-Tan, is fighting a critical heart disease. She has been documenting her experience through this process on Facebook, and here’s an excerpt from the article.

In one of your “Notes of a Revolutionary Patient” entries, “Oppression is Trauma,” you describe how doctors have made your weight the central issue without asking your key questions about your mental health, past eating disorders or other relevant factors. How did you recognize that bias was a factor?

I realized I was receiving biased medical care the moment they didn’t ask me what work I have done and haven’t done to “be healthy.” The moment they told me, “You need to lose weight” without asking my personal health journey, I knew they were judging me. They didn’t look at me as though I was a person; they just looked at my pounds. If weight is the issue, okay fine—let’s discuss the weight [and] what got me here. But i think it’s more than just weight. For any patient, doctors need to know the details. I know that there’s a whole herstory about me. I’ve [suffered] a range of mostly invisible disabilities including depression, bulimia and binge-eating/compulsive disorder. In my 30s I was diagnosed with anxiety and panic disorder, agoraphobia, diabetes, hypertension, sleep apnea, bipolar disorder and severe allergies that require two shots a week for three years. I also have an Auditory Processing Disorder, which I occasionally reframe as a different learning style. Doctors need to take their time explaining things to people; many people have different learning styles.

Talk about how systemic racism has shaped your own medical care.

Well, the simple fact that the health care industry is not [generally] educated in social justice, power, privilege and oppression* is* systemic racism. Any healthcare space treating people of different races, classes and genders need to be educated about systems of oppression. The better informed they are about the challenges that different people of multiple identities face, the better they are going to be able to understand the needs of that person.

For example, if a doctor knew what struggles a Pinay like me faces, [he or she] would know that Filipino adults are 70 percent more likely to be obese in comparison to the rest of the Asian population. They would also know that in the U.S., 15.93 percent of Asian-American women have contemplated suicide in their lifetime and that there is a rise of depression amongst Filipino Americans. … They would understand cultural norms and know that there is a thing called “hiya” in where we don’t bring shame to our families by seeking something like mental healthcare.

How does sexual violence factor in?

It is important to understand that the sexual violence of womyn of color in itself already shows the intersection of sexism and racism. In general, sexual violence has always been a way to dehumanize womyn, just as racism is used to disempower people of color overall. So the sexual violence against womyn of color is a combo of racism and sexism. These intersected isms, along with [negative] stereotypes increase the vulnerability of different womyn of color.

For young(er) women of color embarking on multilayered careers like yours—one that involves male-dominated competition, art, travel, teaching and speaking about often unpopular topics—are there any self-protective steps you can suggest?

It is important that when we give so much of ourselves to our careers, to our activism, to our communities that we are grounded. I’m surprised I have lasted this long, going the way I was going. I feel I’m already a pretty grounded person; I’ve been able to maintain my morals and values but yet I still fell sick.

What I have been learning as of recently, is to really be balanced. Sometimes, we think we’re okay, that we are invincible and that we can keep on going. But the truth is, we might not really be. We need to listen to our bodies, our minds, our souls and our hearts. I need to do a better job of listening to my whole me. … If we can be honest [with] ourselves, be open and vulnerable in knowing that it’s okay to make mistakes, to see our own imperfections and still love ourselves, we will then be stronger for the long run—for a real revolution.

We recently read Nicki’s blog post about what it’s like to work in entertainment as an Asian female, and felt compelled to share her empowering message. As you can probably guess, and also know from Lynn’s previous posts, that working in entertainment & media is not only hard, but it’s extra hard for Asian Americans and especially females. There’s a notion of what “sells” and on the daily, women are being asked to compromise who they are.

If you don’t know Nicki, she is a self-made multimedia host, producer, and entertainer. This lady does it all! Lisa was honored to have been a finalist along with her for the San Francisco Asian Pacific Heritage “Emerging Leader” Award last year, and we have been admiring her from afar for being such a great role model in our community. 

Michelle Phan (makeup teacher and spokesperson for Lancome) and Nicki, two inspiring Asian American females at FAWN, Michelle’s new YouTube channel launch.

I am not the “model-type” and second of all, I am already surrounded by the societal standards of mainstream (aka “White”) beauty. I’ve had to endure comments working on commercials where they’ve wanted me to wear lower cut tops or boost my cup size to be more “Britney Spears” or more “exotic” like (Yes, these were actual terms used to describe to me what they wanted). I’ve had to endure comments in which every male I interview…apparently “we banged” afterwards. I’ve also had to endure moments when I produce events by myself and the organization is shocked when I, a female, am powering the equipment and calling the shots–to which my reward at succeeding is seeing their shocked faces as if I just slapped them across the Fo’ Head.

I know in sharing my thoughts, I put myself in a very vulnerable position. I do not mean to make you feel like I’m being political or taking all of my sociology classes and throwing it in your face either. Let me also be clear that I am not a “man-hater”. However, I feel that there are far too many women in this world afraid of sticking up for themselves or staying true to themselves for the fear of being called a bitch, stupid, or useless. And this is why I’m standing my ground and sharing my experiences with you. This is the reason why I started my own channel–so NO ONE can tell me who to be or how to do it. Thanks to social media and YouTube, I am able to share my videos with anyone I want without a gatekeeper telling me “it won’t sell” or “it’s not trashy” enough. I can choose stories I WANT to do, or highlight GOOD in our community, and not just because I was assigned to do it. I created this channel because I LOVE personally connecting with people and I CARE to put their stories and important causes out there–it’s not about the hits. It’s not about “I got the story, so now I’m done with you”. I truly care about each person I’ve ever interviewed or collaborated with, so that’s why most of the time the people I interview end up becoming amazing friends.

Media can eat you alive, and I’m just trying to hold onto my values as much as I can so I never lose myself. Since the first day trying to pursue a career as a host, my #1 goal has been to never sell out. Many of you might be thinking that I’m in the wrong field, but I’m here to show other young women that you don’t have to be a “reply girl” or put other women down to get ahead (Thanks to NewMediaRockstars and David So for bringing those videos to my attention).

You can be positive, uplifting, and truly empower your viewers.

We absolutely agree. Read the original post here. 

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Are you on Twitter?  Here’s someone we find inspirational - author Geneen Roth!

You can follow her here.  And, don’t forget - we tweet too!  Here are our feeds: Thick Dumpling Skin, Lisa, and Lynn.

Know something that should be On Our Radar? Contact us!

Sui recently released a free e-book collection of writings on positive body image and loving your body more. 

We read it, loved it, and you should download it.

Better yet, open it up right now!

There are so many phrases that we loved, and we wish we could quote them all. But we’ll leave you with an excerpt that really touched us, from pages 8 - 10: 

This is a list of what losing weight MIGHT do for you.

LOSING WEIGHT MIGHT…

1. result in a different number (that changes every moment anyway) displayed on an external machine that still does not define your intelligence, personality, kindness, attractiveness, sense of humor, or substance

This is a list of what losing weight will NOT do for you.

LOSING WEIGHT WILL NOT…

1. change your life

2. make you look beautiful on your special day if you’re hungry and deprived

3. solve your problems

4. destroy your insecurities

5. mean you will fit in

6. change who you are

7. fix your relationships, friendships, family or marriage

8. grant you popularity

9. give you good luck

10. make you smarter, nicer, richer, more good-looking, or even more athletic

11. find you a life partner

12. make people like you more or think better of you

13. give you a 6-pack or chiseled muscles

14. result in a better sex life

15. cure any illnesses

16. make you feel better about anything

17. change how you feel about yourself or your body

18. mean that you will get you the respect you deserve

19. result in better health

20. make someone else love you

21. give you superpowers

22. make you satisfied with your life

23. give you unconditional happiness

24. grant you 3 wishes from a magical genie

25. make you love yourself

Losing weight will never accomplish any of these things for you independently. Taking better care of yourself, respecting yourself, eating what your body needs, and moving your body can help.

But a different weight is just a different number. And a change in a number on a machine or a shirt tag will not change anything about your life. It will just be a different number on the same machine, the same person in the same body.

You will stay the same person with the same attitude, thoughts, self-respect (or lack thereof), and body image… until you change how you feel about your body FIRST and realize it deserves respect & the best loving-kindness and care. 

Amen to that. Read the book here.

Know something that should be On Our Radar? Contact us!

Ok not exactly a dumpling auction, but at least I have your attention!

Some of you might know that I was the former publisher of Hyphen magazine, and even though I am no longer with Hyphen, I am still very supportive of everything that it’s doing.

Hyphen released its Survival Issue last November, and it’s time to celebrate!

To lend a helping hand, I’ve offered to be “auctioned” off during the party’s silent auction as one of many passionate community organizers to raise money for the magazine and awareness for Thick Dumpling Skin.

If you bid on me, you might just get to dine with me at Facebook’s new Menlo Park campus (where I spend 40+ hours every week). We’ll also go do some awesome community service together. I’d love to show you some of the nonprofits that I am passionate about!

Ask Lynn. She’ll tell you it’s well worth it!

If you’re in the SF bay area, definitely stop by 111 Minna Gallery on Saturday, February 4th. My dear friend Taiyo Na, Dirty Boots, and DLRN are all performing. Plus there will be DJs spinning awesome beats all night, and really, really awesome people dancing their hearts out. Trust me, you’ll have a great time. 

Oh, and did I mention that I have a discount code for you to use too for your tickets? Use “Dumpling.” Bam. Get $5 off any $15+ ticket!

Hyphen never ceases to amaze me. Support this important Asian American platform, because it gave me a voice to tell my story (and countless others too), which really was the true beginning to Thick Dumpling Skin!

Party details here. 

- Lisa 

We launched this site a year ago right around NEDAwareness Week, 2011. Can’t believe a year has flown by already. 

This year, we plan to partner up with NEDA during the NEDAwareness Week to partake in the larger conversation within the eating disorder awareness community. We are finalizing the details, so stay tuned. In the mean time, read more on NEDA’s site on how you can take part too!

A cliche saying I know, but keep calm and carry on!

- Lisa

Here are two great websites that have been on our radar recently:

Proud2Bme

NEDA announced the launch of Proud2Bme at the Teen Summit that Lisa spoke at. It is a new online community created for teens by teens.

Proud2Bme is a unique space where teens can connect with each other, get expert advice, and find inspiration to take action for change. It’ll cover everything from fashion and beauty to news, culture, and entertainment—all with the goal of promoting positive body image and encouraging healthy attitudes about food and weight. There’s a slight possibility that we might be guest-blogging, so keep a look out for that!

Fat Talk Free Week

Not exactly a website website, but we challenge you to avoid talking about fat for an entire week—Oct. 16 through Oct. 22—with the hope that you’ll be more aware of how your words matter and may have a negative effect on those around you. It’s just a week, you can do it!

Learn more about Fat Talk Free Week at the website of sponsor organization Delta Delta Delta.

My Body Gallery is a new website which allows women to post anonymous images of themselves to show what “real bodies” look like.  From their “about” page:

In a world full of images of how we “should” look it can get difficult to tell how we DO look.  Our hope is to build a site where women can see what real women look like.  What we really look like.  Most women have spent so many years looking at themselves in mirrors that we can no longer see what’s really there.  The My Body Gallery project’s goal is to help women objectively see what we look like and come to some acceptance that we are all beautiful.

When you plug in your stats, you will see all kinds of body types - regardless of how much you weigh or how tall you are, each of us carries the pounds in a different way.  Shows us all how unique we are, even when we’re “the same” and hopefully will lead to less comparison with others.